It’s that time of the year again: Happy April Fool’s Day, everyone!
It’s only 8 in the morning from where I’m from and I’m starting to wonder how many of my social media friends will post the ever-original faux pregnancy announcement. I can no longer count the number of people I’ve unfollowed because of this insensitive gag.
Let’s clear things out once and for all: IT’S NOT FUNNY. It never was. It never will be.
Picture this: You finally decide to have a child, but your doctor tells you there’s no chance for you to get pregnant. He says you’re infertile, and there’s nothing you could do about it. How will you feel? What will you do? Will you cry? Will you be upset? Will you be furious and blame God and ask, “Why me?”
You see, that’s what happened to me. And, yes, I cried, I was in distraught, and I played the blame game. I did, however, got over it and chose to look at the brighter side. I made it my mission to prove that doctor WRONG.
It was a grueling two years’ worth of endless tests, injections, and probing until I finally saw those two red lines on my pregnancy test. I spent nearly two months on full bed rest, never leaving our home unless I have a scheduled checkup. I was too afraid that one wrong move may damage my fragile baby. My 6th-week checkup was supposed to be monumental because I would finally hear my baby’s heartbeat. FINALLY! At the hospital, the doctor on duty greeted me with a huge, reassuring smile which made me feel that everything was perfect. Moments later, she fell silent. She called another doctor, and both exchanged a look. At that moment, I knew something was amiss. They were both in and out of the room, their voices hushed, and neither seems to know what to do. Finally, one heaved a sigh and stood beside me. She held my hand and said, “I’m sorry, mommy, but there’s no heartbeat.”
I did not hear a word she said after that. I felt my heart stopped. I felt my whole world shattering in an instant. I tried my best not to cry because I did not want them to see my pain. I did not want them to see how vulnerable I was. I mustered all the strength I could to get up, went outside and saw the excited smile on my husband’s face, and I broke down.
My doctor wanted to schedule an immediate D&C, but I begged him to wait some more. Maybe if I wait a little longer, a miracle would happen, and my baby will live. Perhaps if we gave it some time and prayed harder, He’ll give me my baby back. A week passed, but my miracle never happened. My baby was gone, and it was never the same after that.
It has been five years, and I could still remember the pain like it was just yesterday. It has been five years, and I’m still trying to make peace with what happened. Please tell me, how can you properly grieve someone you never had the chance to meet?
I understand most of you are innocently naïve and it’s not your intention to hurt anyone, but before you post your fake pregnancy news, think about its implications. Think about a couple struggling to get pregnant or a mother silently grieving the loss of her unborn child. What may seem funny to you may be breaking someone else’s heart. So PLEASE, be mindful of what you’ll post. April Fool’s or not.
That’s all for now.
xx, The Lazy Blogger